The Diary
by CodenameSev
Summary: Severus Snape and Hermione Granger. became wedded to each other. Severus learned Hermione's thoughts during their time together. SSHG Sevmione snamione Marriage law.


Severus snape sat down on Hermione's bedside.

A small boy tugged on his robes with tears in his eyes.

"Daddy, is mama going to be ok?" The little boy with dark curly hair moved towards Hermione's bed. His little hands carresing his mama's hand.

"Yes, she will be ok. She's just very tired." He said and lifted the child to sit on his lap.

"Ok." The little boy smiled up to him, his brown eyes looking at him happily. The kid was too young to understand the situation.

A knock on the door made him turn his head, Draco entered and the kid lifted his arms trying to get Draco to carry him. Draco smiled and carried him.

"Hey kiddo. Want to go out for Ice Cream?" Draco looked at Snape and he nodded.

He needed time with Hermione. She doesn't have enough time. The Doctors at St. Mungos gave him the news and her organs are slowly shutting down.

His breathing was heavy and he wanted to scream so loud. In his hand was a diary. It has an embroidered word on the cover. It was Hermione's hand writing too. She must've did it herself. He opened it and saw that it was handmade. She does tend to do things the muggle way.

He started reading the first passage.

" Hey, i finally had the courage to tell him. I walked down the dungeons and confessed my attraction to him. Of course he didn't like it but i stood to my ground and told him my heart. I love him. He laughed and told me that i was mental. But i kept repeating it over and over. I do love him. I really do. I tried real hard to suppress it but as we became colleagues i had an attraction. I do hope that someday he will feel the same. I hope he tries to."

He remembered that day and he smirked on the memory. Hermione was so brave to tell her feelings and he tried to push her away but she never budged.

"He shouted at me a few times during the staff meeting. I was ridiculed but i understand it was really my fault. I should have known better. He was so mad. Maybe he really does hate me. But i just accepted it. I must accept my mistakes and deal with it. Neville comforted me at my rooms. I told him that i was fine. Severus is just driving me away. I still love him. It never changed. Just have to be the bigger person in this."

He sighed. She was right. He tried to drive her away because of her confession. She was simply too young for him.

He flipped the page and found that some of them are blank he flipped five more pages and upon seeing writings he read another.

" Severus smiled. It was the greatest thing. I saw him smile from a joke that i said. It was a simple gesture but why does it feel so big? Merlin. He looked quite young with him smilling it was a brief second but i will cherish it in my Memory. Damn. I sound so melodramatic here. Oh well. Hopefully no one would read this."

He flipped to the other pages and looked at the dates.

"It's the Law. I'm scared. I didn't know who i will be wedded to. CURSE CIRCE! WHY WOULD MUGGLEBORNS BE SUBJECT TO MARRYING A PERSON THAT THEY WOULDNT LOVE!?"

"I found out that i will be wedded with Severus. I'm -- Honestly i was happy. Happy that it was him! Happy that it was someone i know. We both saw each other and i tried to hid my smile. I dont wanna look foolish. He was scowling the whole day. He obviously loathed being married to me. I tried hard to smile. I should be happy right? I'm finally marrying him. I hope that he will feel the same after 3 years. Yes the ministry gave 3 years and after that we can workout a divorce.* Sigh* i bet he is already looking forward to it." A photo was secured by a paper clip and it's their wedding picture. Hermione was smilling happily while holding a Bouquet of Flowers. He was scowling and looked stiff in the picture. His hands were in both of his pockets.

He frowned. Did he really do that? He closed his eyes and looked at Hermione's unmoving form. Her face was thin, her body curvy but still fuller on the hips. Probably from child birth.

"Severus was smiling as he held our first born son. He took him to his arms with great care. You looked so peaceful as you lay down on our bed with the child snuggled into your arms. It was the prettiest picture that i ever took. I love you Severus Snape. Thank you for bringing this child to me." The picture was clipped again. His heavy breathing was captured and the baby's yawn was on playback.

A Doctor suddenly interrupted him from his thoughts he didn't even notice him opening the door.

"Good afternoon, Mister Snape. Here is Mrs. Snape's Ultrasound. The baby is still alive."

His eyes widened. She's Pregnant?

"Hermione's Pregnant?"

"Yes Sir. 3 months Pregnant." The doctor bid goodbye and left the room.

He brushed his face and sighed. Merlin. Why didn't she tell him?

He furiously opened the diary and searched for a more recent date.

"I went to visit George today, Well i was actually going to my check up cause i'm feeling a bit helish this past few weeks. The heck i'll visit him first before i go. I headed to the shop and it was closed so i headed to the clinic. It still amazes me. Wizarding clinics are faster than muggles and i learned that i wasn't pregnant. I was diagnosed to have atrial septal defect, i have a hole in my septum, i have a heart condition. The doctor gave me a few potions to take and i bought them then shrunked them to fit my bag. I was really nervous. I needed to meet and talk to someone. I headed to George's shop and thank Merlin that i saw him. he was about to head out and eat. We went to the leaky cauldron and i saw Severus. He was with someone. A dark haired woman. I recognized her to be a new professor at Hogwarts. Why did... I didn't jump into conclusions and stopped George from accosting them. I told him that i already knew that Severus would be with a meeting and i just didn't know when it was. He nodded and i told George that i was running late for a meet up. I didn't get to tell him about my condition i just really wanted the company. Maybe Severus refusing to accompany me was a blessing in disguise. I don't want him to know about my condition. I looked back and saw Severus smile. It was the same smile that he gave me when i told him a joke. But his smile here was different. Severus was smilling and laughing wholeheartedly in public. He never did that before. He never had given me that smile before. My heart clenched. I gripped on it. Scared if it was because of my heart condition or was it my heart breaking?"

He clenched his fists and looked at her unmoving form. You foolish woman. Why did she love a person like him. She doesn't deserve a cheating husband.

He turned the page and read another.

"I was called by the doctor and i learned that i was Pregnant. He told me that i shouldn't take the Potions as it may harm the baby. I smiled. We will be having another baby! Severus will be happy once he learns it."

She didn't take ny potion cause of the fear of harming the baby.

"I asked him to accompany me today at the Clinic. I'm feeling a bit out of the weather. Maybe it's the baby. I would also tell him about it. Today, I hope he will be happy. Atleast with the baby."

" I need strength. I saw him. I think he's thinking of leaving me now. I realized that it's already 3 years and i saw him at the Ministry. He's probably getting the paper's done. What about our baby? Do i need to tell him?" The writing was a bit smudged because of tear drops messing with the ink. She was surely upset as she written this.

"I went to the Clinic and i wasn't alone. Luna accompanied me. I was thinking of some options. I thought this through. I will be leaving soon. I ... truly did love Severus but i'm only human. I didn't want to let go but he didn't even held on to what we have from the start. I need to move on. I'm letting him go."

Severus dropped the diary and looked at Hermione's unmoving form his eyes moved towards her hand and saw their wedding ring.

He grabbed the diary again and flipped the page over.

"But i still love him."

He looked back and saw her monitor. Losing the beats. Turning to a flat line.


End file.
